Trek Date – Before getting Married

A guy ready to marry and a lot of questions.

  1. How would be my wife
  2. Will she be good in marriage
  3. will we be like friends or Husband Wife?
  4. How will she react to life, daily

And lot more questions of same nature. So told my parents clearly that i will have atleast 5-6 meetings with her in person to understand her. To which my mom said yes (confused, thinking what will she say to the parents of girl). My dad, just ignored and carried on with his news!

And I came to my desk, started surfing and came to this wonderful article on Trek Date.

Most couples who are thinking of getting married waste an enormous amount of time dating each other over expensive cups of coffee in the hope that they’ll get to know each other better.

I have bad news for you. You won’t.

In an artificial setting like a coffee shop, restaurant or a park, you only talk. Yet, we spend most of our married life doing things – making breakfast, going to office, sending the kids to school. And in doing these ordinary tasks we display our love, respect and consideration towards one other. It cements our bond and our marriage becomes stronger.
Trek Date
A trek date is an excellent way to check if your partner possesses qualities to make a marriage work. On a long trek – preferably over 5-6 days – the mask of the city wears off quickly and the real person surfaces. It makes sense to keenly observe this real person.
Here are a few points for you to observe:
  1. Is your partner capable of sticking to the discipline of a trek? A trek requires discipline in schedule, preparation and routine. So does life.
  2. Does your partner complain? A Himalayan trek is not easy. If your partner finds fault with things – from the difficulty of the terrain, to the quality of food; to the conditions of your tent, to the transport used, your partner is a whiner. If you have a complaining partner your life is going to be similar.
  3. Does your partner cooperate? Like a trek, life is a series of cooperation – at home and work. If your partner cooperates with most situations it speaks of a healthy mind and heart. Check if your partner volunteers for cooperative activities that does not directly benefit themselves, say in arranging the tent or packing  sleeping bags or getting tea for others. The more cooperative the partner the safer is your future.
  4. Does your partner make the best of situations? On a trek times will come when things go out of control. What does your partner do in such situations? Show frustration and complain or try to make the best of the situation? You need a life partner who can deal with bad situations in a cool and composed manner. A dose of humor is a bonus.
  5. Does your partner mingle and mix? When at camp does your partner spend time talking with others and learning from them or does your partner like to be alone or sticks to you. All of us like to be left alone at times – but mingling with others is part of our social world. Partners who stick to you al the time in an outdoor situation will either be a pain later or is faking it.
  6. Does your partner show consideration to the world? Does your partner pick up fallen chocolate wrappers on the trek? Does your partner have a kind word and gesture towards the guides and porters? Does your partner spend time with a trekker who is down? A considerate partner is far more important in life than a loving partner.
  7. Does your partner ask people (however sweetly) to get things like tea, warm water, or dinner? It takes an effort to head to the kitchen for these things – but it also shows a human being who is self sufficient – someone who doesn’t order people around. A partner who orders is a menace for the future.
I hope these pointers will help you choose your partner wisely. Going on a “Trek Date” is a new way of seeing the most important person in your life.
Trek Dates are becoming increasingly popular among the urban youth. It is easy to see why. Trek Dates help unmarried young men and women find life partners. They get to meet prospective partners and also check their compatibility in real life situations – something modern coffee shops don’t allow.
Isn’t it interesting?? Whats your opinion??

Why did I ever meet you?

Lonely

I don’t remember the moment our friendship had changed into something else. It was not a sudden transition like the soft breeze turning into a howling wind.Not even that of the pleasant drizzling transformed into a harsh thunderstorms, It was quite vague, rather!

It might have started when I had missed talking to you for the first time…It might have happened when you had said something as though you had had the ownership rights over me…It could have occurred when I had dialled your number anticipating the pleasure of hearing your voice at the very first moment…It could even have started when you had called me up, hurt and bleeding in your heart, sharing your wounds with me and wanting to get the solace from me…It could have happened in a million other ways and it had happened!

We were just sharing…we were sharing the finer details on our family, friends and that of our work life! We were sharing the comfortability of being the people of the same age group.We were sharing the hardships, happiness and that of innumerable ups and downs of our respective lives! We were sharing the day to day activities that take us thru the sunrise till the sunset! We were just sharing…

It was so comfortable being together with you, chatting, talking, meeting, But essentially we had felt all alone together in the middle of all these happenings! There was this contentment of just being together with you. There was this huge safety zone of liking and understanding each other. It was so easy being with you that I could always complete what you had wanted to say. And amazingly most of the time, you did the same thing…

Though we shall be the happiest when we shall be together…….
Thinking of the end of all these… I  would be longing to get back together as well. Would be thinking of each other when we are apart from one another…

but by the end of all these, I shall be with my family. And you shall be with your own family.

We are together and we are not together. We cannot be together all the time as we have a history of our own. The history exists well before we had met each other and had started longing for each other.
I had evolved a strict code of circle around me and was circling within that circle all through my life. It was home, work, home, work and then home again! There was this sort of a basic contentment and calm in such a life. No complications and no troubles…just home, work and home again!
And then, I had met you!

You were an ordinary person, just like I was! Not spectacularly outstanding!  You were just you, an ordinary person, just like I was just I, an ordinary person…You were running around within your own circle, created by you for you, your family and for your friends, much like I was running within my own circle all thro my life…

Somehow, we had met and became good friends. It was as though we had been destined to meet and become good friends…Talking to you was as easy and as comfortable as though sliding over the ice sheet…May be this was the connection of the soul, may be this was something more beyond that! It had amazed me when I had realized that I had let go of thousands of people in all these years of my life and had just chosen you to be my best friend…It was as though unconsciously I was waiting for your arrival for a very long time now…

I had met you just a couple of times in all these months…Because meeting in direct contact with each other was very rare for us.You were living at one corner of the world and I was at the other corner of the world! We had met on a few rare occasions, which have been engraved in my heart!

Still, we had kept in touch on a daily basis…The trust I had had on you was something the most spectacular to me! It was amazing as though there was nothing I couldn’t share with you… You were accommodating, understanding and were always there to listen to my stupid thoughts…

When I had heard your voice, it was as though I had felt the peace and calm descending on me simultaneously! I had felt so happy that I could feel my entire body relaxing from head to toe…You had such a wonderful voice, soothing, teasing and being very nice to listen to…On your part, you had shared with me your daily life and living…the hurts, an occasional insult and the ups and downs of your day to day happenings…

I had felt sympathized with you, enraged at the audacity of the people to hurt or insult you…I just couldn’t stand if someone had uttered even a single word against you!

But then,

It shall be tough for both of us to get out of the whole history of our life time.I wouldn’t know what I shall do without my people.I know you wouldn’t betray the trust of your people either! But still, I long for you with such a longing which frightens my whole being. There are no visible chains that bound me. But still, there are stronger invisible chains that won’t even budge if I want to move off…

Why did I ever meet you?