Found this article in Mid-Day

Most men are okay experimenting before they get hitched, but they prefer if their woman is untouched - Munira Chendvanker

I had been the “easy” one among my friends. I was the one who got kissed first, and couldn’t quite understand what was taboo about “making out”. My friends teased me about my long list of boyfriends. But it was okay. I tried things at my own pace, except when it came to sex.

I was a virgin when I got married, and if I ever tell them, they’d raise an eyebrow. I went from being easy to stupid, in a span of three years. Suddenly, experimenting was the right thing to do. What if you got married to someone you weren’t sexually compatible with, my friends would’ve argued?

She’ll wait till she’s comfortable

Munira Chendvankar, a second year Bachelors of Mass Media student at KC College, was only expressing her opinion among friends over coffee, when the “I want to wait till I’m married” line silenced the rest. “They were surprised. I don’t know what the big deal is, though. Sex is
hype. I want to wait because I want to be comfortable with the guy I share my body with.

And that, I believe, will happen only once I marry,” says the 18 year-old, who hasn’t been in a relationship, and says she will date a man who respects her decision. Munira’s
parents, who she shares a close bond with, trust her. “They’ve told me never to cross the line. I don’t want to break their trust. Love is more important than lust, anyway.”

Munira is an anachronism

The crowd she hangs out with, the lifestyle they lead, luxuries they enjoy, make for a setting where sexual freedom would be permissible. Munira’s classmate Priyanka Vohra, 18, stands at the other end of the spectrum, saying it depends on the relationship and individual. “Why is sex before marriage seen as wrong? It’s pretty obvious that everyone is doing it,” she shrugs.

Marriage is boring

TV anchor Suprita Mitter, 24, has a boyfriend, but insists she’s going to wait to get married to pop her cherry. “Marriage is so boring. If we had sex before marriage, we’d take away the most exciting bit of being married.” Besides, Suprita stresses, the consequences can be complicated for a woman.

Abortions are routine

Unwanted pregnancies are on the rise in India, but it’s Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs) that are raising an alarm among gynaecologists. Dr Rishma Dhillon Pai, Consultant at Lilavati and Jaslok Hospitals, reveals she’s been conducting almost 25 abortions a month. “What’s
worrisome is the attitude youngsters display. Most of them think it’s all okay.” The girls are usually aged 19 to 25, and belong to the city’s elite.

Society, religion dissuade some

The city’s psychologists believe the reasons for shying away from sex, could be many. With our conservative sensibilities, most Indians aren’t comfortable with their body, raising the fear of rejection, when exposed. Psychologist Dr Seema Hingorrany says, “I’ve also encountered some who are fiercely career driven. Sex complicates a relationship. They don’t have time for extra baggage.”

For others, it has to do with morals and religion. Dr Rahul Ghadge, psychiatrist with Bafna
Polyclinic tells you how “wrong” is considered a synonym for sex, since some religions stress on celibacy before marriage, and frown on contraception. “Some youngsters may feel sexual freedom before marriage is not in keeping with societal norms. There is this notion of turning ’second hand’ if you’ve lost your virginity,” he says.

Tell the world how you lost it

If losing your virginity was one of the best things that happened to you, why not share the experience? And if it wasn’t, you can still share it, provided you have the b*lls. The Virginity Project is a blog where readers are invited to share experiences about losing their virginity. If you aren’t bold enough to post, you can always read, right? Log on to http://www.virginityproject.typepad.com